"We are undone"

Missing: wedding ring. Last seen attached to cheap black watch.

I really went missing a few months back, and I have been slowly tearing the house apart bit by bit. We think the two year old moved it somewhere, hopefully not into the trash. She has been asked about it so many times now that whenever it comes up she just says “maybe Daddy throwed it at the trash?”

I mention this because earlier today I decided that she might have stashed it into my knitting basket, so I did a good thorough cleaning to see if it was there. It is amazing how much this basket acts like a personal scrapbook - Bits of wool from the girls new mittens, the last few inches of Italian yarn from a scarf for a friend, the cotton from my daughter’s baby blanket.

I was surprised that there were so many unfinished items as well.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not a chronic un-finisher. It is a smallish basket and I typically do finish the things I start in a timely manner. I buy the yarn, decide on a pattern, change the pattern beyond recognition and knit fairly quickly.

The things that lie undone were all for me. I haven’t finished any of MY projects for over a year.

This hits me as a pretty good statement on having small people rooming with us for the next 18 years. So often I do have to drop what I need to tend to a skinned knee, sick tummy, or a shoe crisis (and yes, at 2 and 4 we have them WAY too often, but I digress.)

It was interesting today to see how this accumulates over time. The caramel colored cotton cardigan, the cabled recycled-wool vest, the too skinny summer tank.

The funny thing is for the past few days I have been rather grumpy with myself, feeling bad for being selfish for being so put out for having to take care of everyone else while they were sick last weekend. Those with kids know, days with out shower, no sleep. Worst, no real time to knit! Really it is all internal grump, they were well cared for, I wasn’t selfish, but still I worry.

But looking at the knitting basket today got me started thinking about my non-knitting life. I don’t just put off my knitting, but sleep, eating right, exercise.

I think it might be time to take some time for myself. I don’t think I have actually been alone in months. Besides, winter, such as it is down here, is coming and this year I could really use a vest.